Friday, Aug. 28, 2009

Unhealthy folks need a break, too

I see Rep. Henry Brown has offered a health insurance plan wherein the healthiest among us will get break on our health insurance.

At first glance, it sounds like a great plan to someone like me. For one thing, it doesn't take 1,100 pages to explain like those various Democrat plans. A paragraph or two and voila! problem solved.

The best thing, of course, is that I've been pretty healthy all my life, and even now I feel pretty darn good. OK, there's a mild bout with Type 1 diabetes, but all that's done is make me eat healthier. It's like a blessing. I sure hope the insurance companies see diabetes as a blessing.

I play a lot of golf and walk when I can, and I ride a bike almost every day, often for eight or 10 miles.

I still do yard work when the wife puts her foot down. And just the other week I outran a swarm of yellow-jackets. That should be worth 10 bucks right there.

I'm also thinking about doing the next Myrtle Beach Marathon. I'll be 70, and I think that would be a greater accomplishment than doing it at, you know, 62, or whenever I did the last one.

In fact, when I add it all up, my health insurance should be almost free. What a country.

I haven't smoked in 24 years, and I guess the plan would reward me for that, too. But what would keep me from fibbing if I did smoke? And what would insurers do about that? Put a hidden camera in my bathroom? Give me a chest X-ray every six months?

On the other hand, I smoked for almost 27 years. Would that give insurance companies cause to blame everything, even a case of the sniffles, on the catch-all pre-existing condition of smoking?

There could be another problem. When we add up all the wonderful breaks I get, what will happen to those not so fortunate? Insurance companies don't give it away, so I'm wondering: Won't their health insurance cost double or more?

That seems odd. The sickest, least able to afford health insurance would pay through the nose. Those of us lucky enough to be born with the right genes, or under the right stars, would pay little.

I guess it's the American way, but I still have to worry a bit.

I'm already a great-grandfather and just a few years away from a rocking chair, a drool cup and a shawl, whiling away the day with a balloon tied to my wrist. How will I ever afford the premiums then?

World Am slam

I'll be playing in the PGA Superstore World Amateur Handicap Championship next week. And once again you can follow my feeble efforts to win it all in Sports.