Friday, Feb. 05, 2010

Helping the Grammys enter the digital age

You have to love awards shows. With all the glitz and glamour, the showmanship, and the celebrities hamming it up. And the awards - wait where did all the awards go?

It's no secret that the Grammys are no longer really about giving out gold gramophones as much as they are a showcase for larger-than-life performances and once-in-a-lifetime collaborations.

In theory, I don't have a problem with this. It keeps viewers engaged and gives gossip bloggers something to talk about Monday morning. Sure, it produces its own share of hits (Lady Gaga and Elton John) and misses (Beyonce desecrating Alanis Morisette's "You Oughta Know"), but in general this genre-bending mashup of top talent is a must-see TV for music fans.

The problem comes, however, when the Recording Industry Association of America spends five minutes to trot out its fearless leader Neil Portnoy who blabs on about how artists need compensation for their product - basically saying digital music is killing, not expanding, the industry.

Not only is this message misguided and a bit shortsighted, but it also takes up precious time in which they could be giving out more awards.

I'm not talking about some of these bottom-tier awards given out at the pre-Grammy ceremony - things like Best Album Notes or Best Historical Album. I'm talking about awards the RIAA should be giving out.

Ones that represent the real future of music and honor digital downloads instead of dismissing them as a detriment to the business. Here's some ideas:

Digital Download of the Year | Of course, the Black Eyed Peas did actually win a Grammy for their hit song "Boom Boom Pow" (Best Short Form Music Video), but not one that represents just how dominant this dance anthem was on the charts this year.

Its 12-week run atop the Billboard Hot 100 was only eclipsed by the band's other huge hit "I Gotta Feeling," which was No. 1 for 14 weeks.

Coming in as the year's most downloaded single with more than 4.25 million units sold, it became the fastest-selling digital track ever, topping the 4 million mark in just 23 weeks - beating out Flo Rida's "Low" - and rightfully earning its spot among Grammy winners.

Ringtone of the Year | This much-maligned form of cellular self-expression has become a sort of scapegoat for what's wrong with music these days, but no awards list would be complete without at least a mention of these tiny tunes that account for billions of dollars in sales each year.

According to the Nielsen RingScan, "Kiss Me Through the Phone" by Soulja Boy was the top downloaded ringtone of 2009, but I'm convinced that a Grammy winner deserves this award as well.

I know my sample size is a bit small and unscientific, but a few months back I experienced my wife's boss, her co-worker, the co-worker's sister-in-law and some college girl at a bar all using Best Rap Song winner "Run This Town" by Jay-Z featuring Rihanna and Kanye West as their ringtone in the same night. Like I said, it's more of a hunch than anything, but when I see a song that can bridge age barriers to function as a personal theme song for so many, I think it deserves some notice.

Pirated Song of the Year | Joining the ranks of the most-pirated movie ("Star Trek"), most-pirated TV Show ("Heroes") and most-pirated e-book ("Kama Sutra") of 2009, the most stolen song of the past year belongs to pop icon/occasional train wreck Britney Spears.

According to file sharing site The Pirate Bay, Spears' "Womanizer" was the most illegally downloaded track of 2009. Spears lost her only Grammy bid for "Best Dance Track" to Lady Gaga, but beat out Gaga's "Poker Face" when it came to illegal downloads. At least she can take solace in the fact the folks who are too cheap to pay for music still love her.

Best Grammy Cover | Sure, Beyonce deserves some credit for making her power ballad "Halo" a Grammy-winning Record of the Year, but it may be that the best version of this track has yet to be heard.

Shortly after Sunday night's ceremony, former Grammy nominee Diplo (nominated in 2009 for producing on M.I.A.'s "Paper Planes") posted a shot at the diva on Twitter, claiming his group Major Lazer had recorded a better version of the song featuring dancehall legend Elephant Man.

While it's hard to call a winner in this battle - it likely comes down to whether you prefer reggae over R&B - the Major Lazer version is definitely worth a listen, as Elephant Man's cagey Jamaican growl gives the song a decidedly different feel. Check out the song at tinyurl.com/majorhalo.

Best leak | Most in the recording industry would say leaks are a bad thing. There are endless examples of songs leaks that affect album sales, such as those that forced Jay-Z to push up the release of his chart-topping "Blueprint 3" album.

However, this year, there was one specific leak that had success without breaking any copyright laws. The album titled "Internet Leaks" was an EP by novelty-song master Weird Al Yankovic.

This collection of singles from the past two years and a new track titled "Ringtone" - about the perils of having an annoying ringtone - was released digitally in August and ended up going on to be nominated for Best Comedy Album at the Grammys. Yankovic didn't bring home the gold Sunday, losing out to S.C. native Stephen Colbert's "Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All!" but he should have been recognized for his ability to make his past digital releases chart like a real album.

Best YouTube Spoof | The creators of this ubiquitous video site will surely tell you different, but I believe spoofing popular music videos is more or less the main objective of 90 percent of YouTube users. That said, there are almost too many nominees for this award to count, but I'm gonna take the easy way out and agree with the infamous Kanye West in choosing the winner here, by saying, "Beyonce had one of the best videos of ALL TIME!"

The number of views on a single spoof of Beyonce's "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" video are staggering enough - more than 12 million views to watch cute little Arianna do the video's dance moves. But when you consider the sheer number of consequent spoofs, including entries from Barack Obama (impersonator), Jonas Brothers frontman Joe Jonas, and the Detroit Pistons mascot, no other meme compares.